ilovefuzz.com

snipelfritz wrote:I...don't...know...anymore.

Man, you've been through a lot of shit recently. You've noticed how things have been piling up and it's scary as shit to think about seeking support when you're this vulnerable. But recognizing that something needs to change is a huge step. I hope you do reach out to someone soon. Feel free to PM me anytime if you need to talk with someone

basti moon wrote:My sister once told me, after getting that same fuckit feeling and doing stupid stuff, that she didn't see someone screwing up all the time, but an artist struggling with artist things.
Sounds pretentious, also true. The more you fight it, the faster the sudden chugging of wine will come on, the more you let yourself do creative things in all forms the less the black dog will come out to bite you. It's not good or bad, it's just the weldsmertz of an artist.
Getting help is great. This is complicated stuff and what I say doesn't make the best sense. People who have helping smarts are great at perspectives like that, getting help doesn't mean dumbing you down or doping you up. If you think you need to check yourself in somewhere, go for it. Otherwise, do something at least, group therapy, go on a soul search in the jungle, marry your muse, don't wait until things are better again and you've forgotten all about it!

This makes a lot of sense.

i've said in the past that one of my reality rules is that if you think you're going nuts, consult a mental health professional. it sounds like you need some kind of adjusted/different medication if you're getting manic. and for fuck's sake cut down on your drinking...alcohol + hypomania are NOT a wise combination.

dubkitty wrote:i've said in the past that one of my reality rules is that if you think you're going nuts, consult a mental health professional. it sounds like you need some kind of adjusted/different medication if you're getting manic. and for fuck's sake cut down on your drinking...alcohol + hypomania are NOT a wise combination.

For a second, I read that as "if you're going to go nuts, consult a mental health professional".
So doc, how nuts shall I go?
*Clooney removes stetoscope and looks up like Clooney does*
Oh, I'd say quite a bit. Nurse, bring me a jar of lsd laced bees. And some bath salts.

I was all set to pick up this AB from Thom but after looking at it for a month or so it sold before I got it.




If it was one of you dudes that picked it up....DIBS ON THE FLIP!

MEC wrote:I was all set to pick up this AB from Thom but after looking at it for a month or so it sold before I got it.




If it was one of you dudes that picked it up....DIBS ON THE FLIP!

Dude get that one with the Skull and when you do get an Algal make sure to get the Germanium choke option cause the Algal RULES with Germanium diodes...

another argument with my cousin/host, provoked by me waking up from a nap and hearing him bitching to his gf about me. boy, am i sick and tired of him. i can't seem to get anything going here, either. i'm beginning to wonder if i should get the fuck out of here sooner rather than later, heading for the wilds of somewhere i know people. I wish i could get back to California, but i've pretty much lost hope of that. starting to wonder if Austin might be better course, but the weather there is horrible even by Chicago standards.

all i want to do is go home...but the only homes i've ever really known are being a child with Mom and Dad, and the apartment i shared with a second wife in San francisco.

Spent most of the day in the hospital because my headache was so painful I was reduced to tears and thrashing. Had a spinal tap done to test my spinal fluid to make sure I didn't have viral meningitis (I don't, thankfully). Spent, tried, sore....

but mainly I'm pissed because I didn't get to see Torche tonight because of all this bullshit

There is nothing more agonizing than waiting on Otter Pops to freeze.

kbithecrowing wrote:Spent most of the day in the hospital because my headache was so painful I was reduced to tears and thrashing. Had a spinal tap done to test my spinal fluid to make sure I didn't have viral meningitis (I don't, thankfully). Spent, tried, sore....

but mainly I'm pissed because I didn't get to see Torche tonight because of all this bullshit

Holy cow! I hope they can figure out what's going on. That sounds horrible

If I was in any sort of position to offer anyone help dubs I'd gladly offer whatever I could. I really keep hoping to read how things are getting/have gotten better, and I just wish there was something I could do...

kbithecrowing wrote:Spent most of the day in the hospital because my headache was so painful I was reduced to tears and thrashing. Had a spinal tap done to test my spinal fluid to make sure I didn't have viral meningitis (I don't, thankfully). Spent, tried, sore....

but mainly I'm pissed because I didn't get to see Torche tonight because of all this bullshit

I had a spinal tap once, it didnt take and spinal fluid leaked. Spent two weeks in constant pain and tears, screaming out at god and every nerve in my body going off when I stood up not to mention my brain feeling like its trying to break out of my skull. When I layed down it was better because the fluid would be more evenly distributed...but I couldnt stand up to piss with out screaming and crying. I would have to crawl with my ass up and head down to get the toilet and push through the pain to piss. Im sure the only pain worse than that is being set on fire...but even then the fire would burn the nerves in matter of minutes. Two weeks later I saw a different doctor and he was all "duh, replace the missing fluid with blood." Worst pain of my life...made "pain" after that seem like nothing.

Im sorry for your pain bro, ive been there...sorta...I wouldnt wish it on anyone. and missing torche...thats a double fuck you from the cosmos.

warwick.hoy wrote:There is nothing more agonizing than waiting on Otter Pops to freeze.

lol, they're 10x better when they're only slightly chilled. If they're frozen, I just have to do the work of thawing them in your mouth.

Still feeling kind of cruddy, still taking pills and drinking tonight, but I'm also staying home tonight.

The DJ gig (I really just set up the PA and we all took turns playing shit off laptops) went well; The cops came like half an hour after we set up, around 7:00. And told us to keep it down which was ok. Then the party petered out around 11, (I think) I packed up and went to another grad party. Yeah, I probably shouldn't have driven then . I mostly remember hanging out, and remember having a good time. My friends younger brother was passing bong rips around too (I seriously still remember this kid as being a spazzy 11 year old and now he just graduated high school), so I woke up in a recliner there.

TBH, I feel like I'm just going to have to slowly put hard lines on myself and basically not sociallize much at all, because that ends up with me driving bad.

psychedelicrelic wrote:

kbithecrowing wrote:Spent most of the day in the hospital because my headache was so painful I was reduced to tears and thrashing. Had a spinal tap done to test my spinal fluid to make sure I didn't have viral meningitis (I don't, thankfully). Spent, tried, sore....

but mainly I'm pissed because I didn't get to see Torche tonight because of all this bullshit

I had a spinal tap once, it didnt take and spinal fluid leaked. Spent two weeks in constant pain and tears, screaming out at god and every nerve in my body going off when I stood up not to mention my brain feeling like its trying to break out of my skull. When I layed down it was better because the fluid would be more evenly distributed...but I couldnt stand up to piss with out screaming and crying. I would have to crawl with my ass up and head down to get the toilet and push through the pain to piss. Im sure the only pain worse than that is being set on fire...but even then the fire would burn the nerves in matter of minutes. Two weeks later I saw a different doctor and he was all "duh, replace the missing fluid with blood." Worst pain of my life...made "pain" after that seem like nothing.

Im sorry for your pain bro, ive been there...sorta...I wouldnt wish it on anyone. and missing torche...thats a double fuck you from the cosmos.

Both of these...GOOD LAWD.
Dude, hope it's a passing thing, kbi.

Everything sucks.

Achtane wrote:

psychedelicrelic wrote:

kbithecrowing wrote:Spent most of the day in the hospital because my headache was so painful I was reduced to tears and thrashing. Had a spinal tap done to test my spinal fluid to make sure I didn't have viral meningitis (I don't, thankfully). Spent, tried, sore....

but mainly I'm pissed because I didn't get to see Torche tonight because of all this bullshit

I had a spinal tap once, it didnt take and spinal fluid leaked. Spent two weeks in constant pain and tears, screaming out at god and every nerve in my body going off when I stood up not to mention my brain feeling like its trying to break out of my skull. When I layed down it was better because the fluid would be more evenly distributed...but I couldnt stand up to piss with out screaming and crying. I would have to crawl with my ass up and head down to get the toilet and push through the pain to piss. Im sure the only pain worse than that is being set on fire...but even then the fire would burn the nerves in matter of minutes. Two weeks later I saw a different doctor and he was all "duh, replace the missing fluid with blood." Worst pain of my life...made "pain" after that seem like nothing.

Im sorry for your pain bro, ive been there...sorta...I wouldnt wish it on anyone. and missing torche...thats a double fuck you from the cosmos.

Both of these...GOOD LAWD.
Dude, hope it's a passing thing, kbi.

wfs1234 wrote:Holy cow! I hope they can figure out what's going on. That sounds horrible

Fuck dude, that sounds awful. I'm glad my procudure wasn't anywhere near that painful... but like you said, now you have an experienec to compare pain to which can be quite useful. My sister had a spinal tap when she was little, she flinched and the needle broke off in her back. Eesh...

But thank you dudes