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Olin wrote:Can you guys just imagine a digital butthole for a second please? Or at least a cybernetic one. A perfect anus that guaranteed perfect poops forever, little filters to mask your farts, it could beep when your bowel movements weren't perfect and let you know what you should be eating more or less of. I see you all laugh at the digital butthole, but the digital butthole laughs back.

This is literally in my 3-wish genie list

also, going from poos in this thread to the corgan big muff thread gave this post an interesting tone:

ari3lc wrote:This is the BM I always wanted. Maybe are other options to get that sound, but here, where I live, there aren't so many

[BM is a common abbreviation for "bowel movement"]

MechaGodzilla wrote:

Olin wrote:Can you guys just imagine a digital butthole for a second please? Or at least a cybernetic one. A perfect anus that guaranteed perfect poops forever, little filters to mask your farts, it could beep when your bowel movements weren't perfect and let you know what you should be eating more or less of. I see you all laugh at the digital butthole, but the digital butthole laughs back.

This is literally in my 3-wish genie list

#1 for me jumps over this, straight to "brain in a robot body".

A little more abstract but, I have the absurd fantasy of being the 'mostly' human team member of an elite squad (Basically Togusa is GITS).

Olin wrote:Can you guys just imagine a digital butthole for a second please? Or at least a cybernetic one. A perfect anus that guaranteed perfect poops forever, little filters to mask your farts, it could beep when your bowel movements weren't perfect and let you know what you should be eating more or less of. I see you all laugh at the digital butthole, but the digital butthole laughs back.

Yeah, I know. I thought of it. Gosh!

Corey Y wrote:

MechaGodzilla wrote:

Olin wrote:Can you guys just imagine a digital butthole for a second please? Or at least a cybernetic one. A perfect anus that guaranteed perfect poops forever, little filters to mask your farts, it could beep when your bowel movements weren't perfect and let you know what you should be eating more or less of. I see you all laugh at the digital butthole, but the digital butthole laughs back.

This is literally in my 3-wish genie list

#1 for me jumps over this, straight to "brain in a robot body".

I kinda like my face and hands tho I could just do without needing to eat, poo or sleep

boy, that was an important comma in that last sentence

MechaGodzilla wrote: I kinda like my face and hands tho I could just do without needing to eat, poo or sleep

boy, that was an important comma in that last sentence

Few commas have ever been more narratively crucial.

I've told my wife many times that if I could take a pill or get an implant that would make it unnecessary to sleep, eat and excrete waste, I would. I like eating and cooking, I'm a big fat guy, but I have a lot of of issues with food and when you have those problems, they never end. You can quit booze or pill or weed or smack, but you can't quit eating.

My favorite party conversation is to ask people, if they had to have their brain put into a robot body, would they stay humanoid or get crazy with it. You could be a mechanical spider, a hovering cube, an obelisk on tank treads. In fact, it would probably be easier and more cost efficient, given how difficult it is to make humanoid type robotic limbs work well.

If you were a brain in a robot body, you could still sleep, but rent out your body to companies for work while you're unconscious. Then you wouldn't need a day job.

I always go with the Virus answer.. electrical consciousness that can inhabit many forms. The first and primary host form would of course be an obelisk with crawler treads, spewing laser death from my all-seeing eye..

My poops suck lately. And it's always right after I get out of the shower.
I miss the good old days of dehydration poops, perfect and clean. Now every bowel movement is more like a bowel revolution.

I know that feel. It's even worse when you have a hairy ass. Lately is like trying to clean a guinea pig that just got out of mud puddle.

$harkToootth wrote:Lately is like trying to clean a guinea pig that fell into molasses and rolled through dryer lint.

fixed.

You really know how to articulate what I initially meant. Thank you!

$harkToootth wrote:A little more abstract but, I have the absurd fantasy of being the 'mostly' human team member of an elite squad (Basically Togusa is GITS).

Yesssss. With zen oscillo powers, though. No mech shit.

Also, I am happy to see what this thread and the confessions thread have become thanks to the contributions of a few select posters.

Also, the power of Peter Gabriel's stage persona.

Corey Y wrote:

$harkToootth wrote:Lately is like trying to clean a guinea pig that fell into molasses and rolled through dryer lint.

fixed.

I'm concerned that anyone would keep those three things in such close proximity.