wfs1234 wrote:I hate Father's Day, because I hate my father. And because I have other father-figure-types in my life I'm guilted into getting them something which only further's the point that my real father is a dead beat, porn addicted, narcissistic asshole.
amen sister especially when my sister calls saying hes asking about you its been 10 years does it look like im interested in talking to that rat bastard dance on his grave
wfs1234 wrote:I hate Father's Day, because I hate my father. And because I have other father-figure-types in my life I'm guilted into getting them something which only further's the point that my real father is a dead beat, porn addicted, narcissistic asshole.
amen sister especially when my sister calls saying hes asking about you its been 10 years does it look like im interested in talking to that rat bastard dance on his grave
It's been ten years since I've seen my dad too, and I too will dance on his grave after he finally masterbates himself to death. Fortunately my siblings all feel the same way, so I fortunately don't have to deal with their guilt about not seeing him or his family.
I'm cutting and I don't have anywhere IRL or online that might reply immediately and be "cool" w/o totally freaking out.
I don't even know why. Just kind of feel like I deserve to be punished for feeling so good artificially lately.
I can't even find a decent mental illness forum online, need to start looking at IRL support groups. Anonymity really helps me. Even with super personal problems.
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
Behndy wrote:i don't like people with "talent" and "skills" that don't feel the need to cover their inadequacies under good time happy sounds.
I don't think I can wear a T-shirt for the rest of the summer.
EDIT: And I have this $650 hospital bill from when I drank too much. I just always sabotage myself. And that's just the ambulance I don't think I've gotten the ER bill yet, or if that will slide by under insurance (I'm lucky to be on my mom's state insurance, which is still ok after that FUCK Walker)
BOOM-SHAKALAKALAKA-BOOM-SHAKALAKUNGA
Behndy wrote:i don't like people with "talent" and "skills" that don't feel the need to cover their inadequacies under good time happy sounds.
snipelfritz wrote:I'm cutting and I don't have anywhere IRL or online that might reply immediately and be "cool" w/o totally freaking out.
I don't even know why. Just kind of feel like I deserve to be punished for feeling so good artificially lately.
I can't even find a decent mental illness forum online, need to start looking at IRL support groups. Anonymity really helps me. Even with super personal problems.
I hear you on the forums and the anon thing, nothing is easier than talking to strangers and nothing harder than talking to people that you give a crap about. As for someone to talk to IRL have you considered a health professional? I mean if you just wanted to spill your guts to someone, have them listen and hand out some educated advice then find a psychologist or if you can't afford that then go to a counselor at a community center or get in contact with a charity. I don't know how it is where you are but in Australia there are quite a few charities with "crisis centers" if you need to talk to someone. The support group thing isn't a bad idea either.
I mean I would like to give some specific advice but the cutting thing isn't something I have experience with, I'm a glutton for punishment too but I achieve it in other ways.
snipelfritz wrote:I'm cutting and I don't have anywhere IRL or online that might reply immediately and be "cool" w/o totally freaking out.
I don't even know why. Just kind of feel like I deserve to be punished for feeling so good artificially lately.
I can't even find a decent mental illness forum online, need to start looking at IRL support groups. Anonymity really helps me. Even with super personal problems.
You should join a gym! Weightlifting/exercise can fulfill some of the self-harm desire while also being a constructive activity that you feel good about doing. It's something that's helped me, anyway. I swear there were studies on this but I can't find them right now.
Wish I could give you advice on the talking to people aspect, but I suck at that, too.
snipelfritz wrote:I'm cutting and I don't have anywhere IRL or online that might reply immediately and be "cool" w/o totally freaking out.
I don't even know why. Just kind of feel like I deserve to be punished for feeling so good artificially lately.
I can't even find a decent mental illness forum online, need to start looking at IRL support groups. Anonymity really helps me. Even with super personal problems.
You should join a gym! Weightlifting/exercise can fulfill some of the self-harm desire while also being a constructive activity that you feel good about doing. It's something that's helped me, anyway. I swear there were studies on this but I can't find them right now.
Wish I could give you advice on the talking to people aspect, but I suck at that, too.
I second the gym advice. It can definitely help.
As for talking to people, what about Skyping with people on ILF?
D.o.S. wrote:You're like a walking Mad Men episode.
BitchPudding wrote:DO WHAT MUST BE DONE, LORD JFREY.
friendship wrote:one cool thing about living is that things get worse and worse and worse until you die
snipelfritz wrote:I'm cutting and I don't have anywhere IRL or online that might reply immediately and be "cool" w/o totally freaking out.
I don't even know why. Just kind of feel like I deserve to be punished for feeling so good artificially lately.
I can't even find a decent mental illness forum online, need to start looking at IRL support groups. Anonymity really helps me. Even with super personal problems.
You should join a gym! Weightlifting/exercise can fulfill some of the self-harm desire while also being a constructive activity that you feel good about doing. It's something that's helped me, anyway. I swear there were studies on this but I can't find them right now.
Wish I could give you advice on the talking to people aspect, but I suck at that, too.
I second the gym advice. It can definitely help.
As for talking to people, what about Skyping with people on ILF?
That's a pretty good idea. Heck, it's why I'm taking up playing WoW again. It provides me a way to hang out with all my friends back in Texas.
my cousin, with whom i'm saying, has been bitching at me constantly for the last couple of days. i really am coming to despise him on a certain level. i desperately need to get out of here, but i don't have anywhere to go. and i can't live in my truck with the cats.
i'm also giving up and applying for disability, like so many other people in the current Death of the Old Economy. i've struggled for thirty years to have a life that i created for myself and to be responsible, but i don't think it's ever going to happen again. i've entirely lost hope. if Lulu and my friends didn't need me, i'd have no reason to live.
and now i'm out of weed, and since i'm so shy and fucked up i don't know anyone here to buy from, and i can't go to Michigan for MMJ any more beacuse my card expired.
In girum imus nocte et consumimur igni
FIFTY YEARS OF SCARING THE CHILDREN 1970-2020--and i'm not done yet
getting more depressed by the second. i have a ton of shit i HAVE to do , so i'm going to have to go out. if you hear on the news that somebody went batty in Chicago and ran over a crowd of people in an old Suburban you'll know what happened.
In girum imus nocte et consumimur igni
FIFTY YEARS OF SCARING THE CHILDREN 1970-2020--and i'm not done yet
It's been ten years since I've seen my dad too, and I too will dance on his grave after he finally masterbates himself to death. Fortunately my siblings all feel the same way, so I fortunately don't have to deal with their guilt about not seeing him or his family.
